Hey! It’s me again!
I’m stuck in this cycle again of dreaming and failing and procrastination again. Oh well..
I know why it happens.. Because my foundation is weak. And also because its not my true motivation. Hence, there’s a lack of desire!
~ Oh dear.. Aereids, the play of desire, is without the desire for success.. ~
And because I’ve fallen into the cycle again, it discourages me from trying and I stumble into this pitfall again.
My thinking is.. Successful people did whatever it took to be successful.
But for years, I’ve been interpreting it as “Do anything that can lead to success” and it causes me to try anything and everything, instead of focusing on a single task, get good at it. And since I’m like “all over the place”, my foundation skills are weak, leading to the crumbling failure of any task that I undertake.
Also, I realise I’m intimidated as a result of these mini successes. I’ll have a mini success in a certain field, and when I meet someone who is better, I get discouraged because I thought that because there were so many people better than me, I’m such a loser! My god, its such a sucky mindset!
Excuses, excuses, excuses. Just came here to rant about my poor conduct.
My ability to focus and think critically on one subject, and achieve my tasks has long gone. Need to get it back.
Slowly. *takes a deep breathe* Glad I got this out.